Although, I have heard of Dave Ramsey before I haven't really followed any of his financial teachings. I have always been a Suze Orman kind of guy. While reading a recent post on one of the personal financial blogs I follow regularly, "Blogging Away Debt", I looked more into Mr. Ramsey's approach. I have to say I like what he has to say and even entered his recent $999 emergency fund give away. While flipping through channels just now I come across The Dave Ramsey Show and was enlightened to hear a similar story to that of our highly in debt couple Lois and Clark.
Lois and Clark are a couple who asked what I thought they should do with their extreme unsecured debt load. Dave had a couple call in the minute I started watching the show that totally reminded me of them. The couple was even worse off with unsecured debt load of $300,000. A good $100,000 more than Lois and Clark. So I will share with Lois and Clark what David had to say to help them on their way out of their debt jam.
The first thing Dave said was they were not alone. That he had he been through the same thing before. He said the most important couple of things, even more important than anything else he was going to recommend, was that the couple get their arms wrapped around their faith and then wrap their arms around each other. He told the couple not to let the debt take their marriage. The couple admitted that their debt situation had begun to take a dramatic toll on their marriage, which I am sure from the sounds of it, that the same is happening to Lois and Clark.
The next thing Dave recommended was for the couple to start meeting with a marriage counselor now and again stated, "Do not let this mess with a fifteen year marriage". David stated that women have a security gland that spasms when their afraid. He mentioned to the wife that she is afraid in a place that her husband doesn't have. He recommend that her husband recognized that and was made aware of how she was feeling. He said the husband needed to provide her with non-sexual hugs everyday to let her know it's going to be OK. He then addressed how the husband was feeling and how his ego was probably being crushed right now. He felt her husband is not feeling like Sir Galahad right now. His armor is rusted and sword is dull. He doesn't need a barking Chihuahua barking at heels right now.
He then recommend not cashing out a 401K or anything, but they start working with their creditors. He warned them that they may not be dealing with intelligent life. That creditors tend to want repossess things and have to turn around and sell them rather than work with the debtors. But that they shouldn't be thinking about bankruptcy right now. They should ask for moratorium on their debt and ask for no payment and no interest for a year from their creditors.
He told them not to let this series of events destroy their lives. He reminded them they were go getter's and that they were high income earners before and that they will be again. One day they will be back on top and could get their debt straightened out with out having to file bankruptcy. He also told them not to give up at least not yet.
So taking that advice I want Lois and Clark to remember the following and to start looking into initiating at least some of these steps.
1. If you religious at all get plugged in. Check into some debt support groups. Most churches have small groups that may provide emotional support for your problem.
2. Check into marriage counseling and marriage support groups.
3. Don't give up. Bankruptcy should be your very last choice. Start calling your creditors and see what assistance they will offer you.
If anyone has any other suggestions chime in. Let's help this couple out.
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