What if My Spouse Bullies Me to Debt?

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

What if My Spouse Bullies Me to Debt?

Often opposites attract and generally you find one person more strong willed than the other. If the stronger willed one doesn't care about your finances, guess what? Chances are you'll be in debt and have no savings.

I was talking to a friend of mine today and she told me how different her and her husband are when it comes to their finances. It reminded me of my first marriage and it seems like with her story and mine, the strong willed spouses were the ones bad with finances.

If you are NOT the stronger of the two in your marriage, you MUST learn to speak up when you think something is wrong! I made the mistake of waiting too long when the amount of credit card debt I had in my first marriage got out of hand. I did sort of make the same mistake in my second marriage, but I feel it was different because I just ignored what was happening and I really felt the economy was going to turn around at any minute. I honestly felt everything was going to be back to normal and it was all going to be alright. Don't make the same mistakes I made and follow stupidity. If you know you should not be living beyond your means and charging up your credit cards left and right, do something! Speak your mind!

When it comes to wealth building you both have to work together if it is going to work. If the less assertive one is better with finances, the stronger of the two's bad financial habits are going to take over unless the wiser one stands up for themselves and becomes the stronger one.

If you've never been the stronger one, you'd better learn. Your marriage and your families finances are depending on it. You need to say "NO" when you know too much money is being spent or your credit card balances are getting out of control.

There is no need for name calling or placing the blame, but you do need to get assertive with the situation. The first time you do this you will probably start a fight. My first wife refused to go to counseling, but that might just be what you have to do. You might as well do it now because if your debt is mounting, your upcoming financial meltdown is going to push you in that direction anyway.

For the sake of your family and your financial future, you need to get tough. When you know what is happening is wrong, then say, "This is wrong!" If you don't then, "All you have to lose is Marriage."

[This post is written and copyrighted by Financial Elite (http://financialelite.blogspot.com/ ).]

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